Narrative Gabriela 7th grade

Narrative by Gabriela, 7th grade:

Introduction

There were 2 girls named Gabriela and Patricia,they are 2 sisters that live in the D.R. Everyone thought that these sisters never fight,until one day everything changed.

Chapter 1

One day there were 2 girls named Gabriela and Patricia, Gabriela was 12 years old, Patricia was 10. The sisters never got along.They always fought for no reason,everyone thought that these 2 sisters never fought.

Days past by and for the first time they hadn´t fought. mom said “ Wake up girls it's time to go to school,when they got to school,everything went fine,until we went to recess,Gabriela {they call hey Gaby} was eating very normal and Patricia went to her table and pulled her hair Gaby said “ouch!wait till we go to the house”and then Paty left her alone.

when this 2 sisters got to their house they started arguing,then Gaby said “don´t you talk to me” [but what happen with this girls they never can´t spent one day without talking to each other]

chap 2

Next day,it was wednesday. On wednesday they went to the supermarket. These days don´t go on so good. Mom told Paty Paty go buy 1lb of jam and 1lb of cheese then Gaby went with her. Then she starts pulling her hair,Paty dint notice it this girls spent all the time in the supermarket fighting

chap 3

Gaby gets tired of being in the same bedroom,and then Gaby told her mom “mom can you do another bedroom so Paty and me can be separate” mom said “let me talk to your dad,if your dad said yes,we will make it” gaby got exited

Dad said “ok girls we will do another room for one girl”. The 2 girls got exited. Month,Days,hour,minutes passed by,and the roo was ready. It was how Gaby dreamed it woul de,was very girly,walls decorated how she wanted,the bed covers were very cute. Then her mom bought her a camera,because she likes to take pictures. These 2 girls fight,but not everyday. They live for ever happy

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Now it's your turn! Tell the author what you think about her story in the comments. What improvements can be made?